It's taken me some time to work up the courage to say this here but.....I did it! I have officially graduated. I completed a three year certification process with Sycamore Spirituality Center....first, a one year program called Contemplation in Every Day Life and then a two year program called The Art of Spiritual Direction.
I have a certificate and everything!
I graduated early in May. I traveled to Cincinnati by myself on a Friday afternoon. It poured absolute buckets of rain the whole way! When I arrived at the retreat center on the convent grounds, it was still raining but, despite the downpour, the gardens were absolutely stunning. I was not willing to get out my nice camera but I snapped these shots using my phone from under a large, black umbrella I found in the stand by the door. (I NEVER have an umbrella. I am sure that says something about me.)
After dinner, my friend Margaret and I took a walk around the grounds. We didn't mind that it was still misting rain. We had a lovely chat with one of the sisters who was taking the convent pooch for a walk. As we made our way around the grounds, I felt very drawn to this gate. I do not know why but I really wanted to take a photo of it. I don't think it was locked. Maybe I should have tried to open it....
Later, after everyone had arrived, we gathered in a circle and spent time together, quietly and reflectively, in this beautiful space.
All the things in the middle of the circle have special meaning. I found the circle of light even more beautiful and inspiring than usual. It was quite emotional.
The next day, after spending some time in gratitude for one another, we changed our clothes and got ready to greet our families and friends and then...it was time to graduate!
Michael and the children drove up from Lexington and my sister and niece came too. It was nice to have family there. My spiritual director was also there which was a lovely surprise.
During the ceremony, we were asked to rise and our family and friends layed hands on us. I can't even begin to tell you how special that was.
Each one of us received a blessing. This my mentor, Steve, blessing me. It was one of the first times in my life that I have been in "the center of attention" and didn't mind at all...in the past, nervousness and anxiety have spoiled special moments but not this time!
We were also given a white "khata." A khata is a ceremonial Tibetan scarf symbolizing purity and compassion. The khatas we were given bears the image of a lotus blossom. I especially loved this because of the symbolism of the lotus flower. ReligionFacts website states:
"The roots of a lotus are in the mud, the stem grows up through the water, and the heavily scented flower lies pristinely above the water, basking in the sunlight. This pattern of growth signifies the progress of the soul from the primeval mud of materialism, through the waters of experience, and into the bright sunshine of enlightenment.
Though there are other water plants that bloom above the water, it is only the lotus which, owing to the strength of its stem, regularly rises eight to twelve inches above the surface."
Michael took this photo of me in my khata shortly after the ceremony.
And my sister took this photo of my family.
So, my training and internship period have come to end. I know that the work I have been doing for the past three years, both internal and while sitting with others...one on one and in small groups...has prepared me to go forward confidently with this work.
Recently, I was a co-leader of a beautiful, contemplative Service of Healing. It was very powerful. The day before, I led a group of 12 women in a Contemplative NeedleArts Retreat. I loved the experience and I am getting very positive feedback from those who attended. Last month, I led a Personal Mandala Meditation for a group of women who serve others in the Stephen Ministry program. And the month before that, I worked with a group of social workers and therapists from the Kentucky Center on Trauma and Children, based on Jon Kabat Zinn's work in Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction. I have even put together a brochure about myself and spiritual direction. The one thing I had failed to do was announce it here.
So, UNIVERSE....
my spiritual direction and retreat leadership practice is officially:
And to all of you, I am going officially on record to say that I am available for individual and group direction work. If you want to know more, email me at lisagmaas@gmail.com. If you are part of a group that would like a contemplative experience, send me a note. My emerging specialty is providing creative, contemplative experiences.
I am qualified, prepared and eager to do this work! God willing, I hope to be doing this work for a very long time to come.
Namaste, Lisa
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Last summer, on a whim, I put together a small fairy garden. I used an old english stone trough, pilfered from my antique shop, as the base. The fantasy garden was ostensibly for Little c. She was delighted by it and spent quite a bit of time near it, just looking. And I will admit, I was so taken by my creation (and keeping it tidy...keeping it "right") that I quietly discouraged "playing" with it. I am not very proud of that but that is the truth. This photo is of the fairy garden, last spring.
As the seasons changed, I neglected to winterize the little garden. It survived, mostly intact, and I intended to put it all back to rights at the first sign of spring...that is, as soon as I had time. c asked me about it several times but I had no time. I made lots of promises to get the garden tip top and fairy ready asap, but "not today."
Then one evening, I wandered outside with a glass of wine. My intention is always the same....to sit and enjoy. I have attempted to design our humble garden for this very purpose...there are comfortable chairs scattered about with tables nearby for a book or a mug of coffee, umbrellas for shade and flowers for enjoyment. As winter becomes spring and I long for the garden, what I envision is always the same....me, settling in with a hot mug of coffee early in the morning, or with a cool glass of wine as the sun sets, simply enjoying it all. There is no busy-ness in my vision (and no bugs, either.)
But truthfully, my sitting usually lasts less than five minutes. Inevitably, I scan the garden and, rather than seeing all that there is to enjoy, I begin to notice all the things that need doing and fixing...there are weeds to pull, shrubs to trim, pots to water, flowers to dehead and the list goes on. And, usually within a very few minutes, I am up and moving....my uncle calls it my "Granny gene." He says I come by it honestly. I think, like all things, there is both a blessing and a curse in my granny gene.
This particular evening, after only a sip or two of wine, my gaze landed on the fairy garden and waves of guilt immediately washed over me....I should have made it more of a priority to "fix" the tiny vignette, as I had promised c. And then I noticed something....the fairy garden was decidedly more pink and green than I remembered. Upon closer inspection, this is what I found:
c had transformed the fairy garden with leaves and small bits of evergreen, azalea blossoms and even one purple flower she gathered from a clump of chives. I remembered how amazed she was last summer, when I revealed the fairy garden surprise. Now it was my turn to be surprised and enchanted!
I was most taken with the fairy sized "umbrellas" she had created by perching upside down azalea blossoms on small twigs, strategically anchored in the rock hard ground. I am sure this took a lot of effort on her part.
Honestly, what fairy could resist such a sweet resting spot?
It only took a few moments for my delight to give way to dismay. I felt very guilty that c had felt she must take it upon herself to rescue the garden. After all, she will only be a little girl for a short time... who knows how long this time will last....will this spring be the last when a few bits of broken brick and pottery shards evoke such delight in her?
But, as I sat with all those "bad mommy" thoughts and allowed the guilt to simply pass through me, eventually I had a different thought.
What if there is more to this story than simply the guilt and remorse of a harried mother, neglecting to fulfill a promise? If I've learned anything from the practice of spiritual direction, I've learned that there is always something more.
Could there also have been a gift to c in this?
She loves to express her creativity...she writes and draws and decorates and invents games and makes up funny songs and loves to take photographs and I do my best to encourage all of that....but I must admit, I tend to hold on to some things....like home decor and garden design! In those matters, we often butt heads. I am sure, had I made the time to "fix" the fairy garden, I would have taken charge and perhaps (more than likely) even rejected c's ideas.
As completely unconscious as my stepping back was, still...space was created for little c to act on her own creative impulses. She was so proud and I was truly delighted by what she designed. And in the end, with my need for correctness out of the way, the fairy garden became something far more meaningful than looking picture perfect...far, far more sacred! The garden is still a lovely place for fairies but, more importantly, it is a place for a little girl to express herself.... a canvas that invites, encourages, and nurtures imagination and creativity. A place that invites an encounter with the Divine through creative expression.
Last year, c spent hours sitting and watching the garden...certain that if she waited long enough a fairy would appear:
Now, I am the one who sits and watches the fairy garden...hoping to catch a glimpse of gossamer wings or a sprinkling of glittering dust in this place, now of our shared creation...feeling connected TO my daughter...feeling connected to God THROUGH my daughter.
I do not mean that my distracted behavior toward my daughter is excused and I certainly don't mean that it was "God's plan"...there are lessons for me here about distraction and priorities and, at least for a few days, I know I will be more present to her. But there is always more. The story is never only about our failures. That is what the practice of spiritual direction is about.
The Sacred is moving in EVERY moment of our lives, not just the ones that make us feel good or proud of ourselves. God is just as evident in our parenting failures as She is in our successes. Many, like Father Richard Rohr, believe there is more spiritual growth potential in failure than in success.
Working
with a spiritual director can help you notice and savor the Sacred in all areas
of your life. My guess is that many of you have never heard of spiritual direction and it might even sound a bit odd to you. It sure did to me! The first time someone, a minister, said to me, "Why don't you investigate spiritual direction?" my immediate response was, "Spiritual direction? What the hell is that??"
If you want to know more about what spiritual direction is or perhaps even more importantly, what it is not, send me a note. I will be glad to share information with you. If you are interested in engaging in this ancient
practice, get in touch with me. If I cannot work with you, I will happily help
you find a trained and appropriate director.
God is present in it all and God is longing to be known THROUGH it all....precious little girls and fairy dust and broken promises, azalea blossoms and twigs and rock hard soil...in granny genes, for better or worse....in stillness and busyness, in love and in imperfect parenting. There is sacredness in and of it all.
Namaste,
Lisa
I decided recently to have a play date with my dining room. I think of it as my "puttering meditation." It's fun to experiment with linens and dishes and glassware to create what I see other bloggers calling a "tablescape." (So many "new" words these days!)
If I named this tablescape, I guess I'd call it "french country meets retro american" ...that's an old French wire market basket in the center, filled as if the hostess had just returned from Market Day mixed with vintage and new Fiestaware pottery. I paired the fiesta with 1960's blue pressed glass goblets (a hand me down from my mom that she will likely now threaten to take back!) and linens with a polka dot and spiral motif. The place mats are more traditional and the napkins are a bit more modern. Sometimes the mix works and sometimes it doesn't. I try mixing things up until I like what I see. This mix is special to me...I think because my attraction to the two styles, retro american and french country both represent different periods of my life. I love this integration of the two.
I tried replacing the market basket with an old galvanized metal scoop or dipper. I also swapped the place mats and pottery out. I love how the scoop looks as a centerpiece filled with lemons!
The scoop is listed on ebay but I kind of hope it doesn't sell. (Update: It sold!)
Next I tried a black and white theme featuring an old European enamel flour bin filled with a topiary as a centerpiece...
Here's the flour bin filled with lemons, accompanied by Michael's grandmother's chicken salt and pepper shakers. Got them for my birthday last year! Love them. I think this tablescape needed a bit more work though...maybe a burlap feedsack runner?
This was a spring table I put together for Easter. I use the same things over and over...just changing a few elements...that really is necessary when you are a cottage dweller. Space is at a premium so things must be able to be used in many different ways. Sometimes my life feels the same...time is at a premium so the ways I choose to spend it really need to do double or even triple duty!
I did not expect those napkins to go with the paisley place mats but when I tried them together, I liked the combo. Sometimes my life is like this...I don't expect elements to go together but unexpectedly, they do! When I am playing with my creativity, it is helpful to have "beginner's mind" instead of "expert mind." I never know if something will work until I try.
I've read that if you desire to foster creative impulses, it is important to allow yourself time to play. Often, when we attempt to be creative, we put a tremendous amount of pressure on ourselves because we are focused on the outcome. It is important, if your goal is to foster creativity, to allow yourself "play time" with no attachment to outcome...like a child.
When is the last time you had a play date with yourself? You might consider treating yourself to a trip to your junk store or art supply store soon....or just stay home and play with the toys you already have.
All work and no play....
You might be surprised how restorative a play date with yourself can be. I always am.
peace and all good,
Lisa
With my vision impaired, I have not been getting out of the house much at all. I was getting a little stir crazy so I emailed a friend and suggested a "lunch and junk" outing. She took me up on my offer which was nice because she had to do all the work! She's such a good sport. Once, she rode in my van with her head stuck through a hole in an old screen door I bought for $1. That was the only way we could get home. That's a good, good friend!
We had so much fun! Driving around the countryside of Central Ky on a pretty day was a pleasure indeed and when we landed at a genuine estate sale, I was delighted to find a few things I just could not live without. Here's a photo of my haul, right after we unloaded her truck:
I was particularly captivated by this pair of 1960's paint by number paintings in faux bamboo frames. I debated and debated...are they cool? or tacky? cool? tacky? I really don't care for parrots...I don't think....but I LOVED the colors and really liked the bamboo and exotic flowers. And whoever painted these, from a dime store kit, did a really great job!
When I bought the three dozen or so canning jars, the nice man threw in the unusual square galvanized tub. These jars give me a good start on next year's pickles and jam.
My friend spotted the vintage Minolta camera and steered me towards it. I have a thing for vintage cameras and telephones. I find them irresistible. Maybe because they both facilitate communication? Maybe I wanted the camera because it looked like the one I coveted for years...the one my dad toted over his shoulder in the seventies...not sure...I imagine that's a question I could tackle in my journal soon!
I am very glad I decided not to pass on these two funny little chicken pillows (on the right) for the breakfast nook. They seemed like the perfect companions for the yellow hooked pillow I bought from Garnet Hill last year:
So enthralled was I by my retro paint by numbers art, that I set out to find a spot for those parrots right away. They looked great against the yellow walls of our living room so I decided to try a swap. Over our sofa, we have a large French iron mirror flanked by vintage French sconces and two Victorian era iron heating grate covers:
Love these iron grates but they do lack color....
I decided the parrots deserved a chance.
Yep, that'll work! The parrots bring new energy to the space and I smile every time I see them.
It's fun to have a little make-over, estate sale style! Plus, I got to hang out with my friend. All that's left is to find a place for those white iron grates.
In spiritual direction, we are taught to pay attention. We are taught to continually ask ourselves what feels life-giving...and what feels life-taking.
As I type, I find myself wondering if it's wise to post these photos...you might snicker at my idea of "art"...or you might think that my time could have been used more productively...that I could have been doing something more important or "real."
Maybe. It might be silly...inconsequential...genuinely a waste of time. It may not be productive or bring kudos...but looking for treasure among junk and puttering about my house fills me with a sense of life.
If Spirit whispers to me....make your home with cast off 1960's dime store art, a 50 cent pair of imperfectly sewn calico chickens and a junky old galvanized washtub...who am I to argue?
Resisting the movement of Spirit never seems to have gotten me anywhere, except stuck. That doesn't mean that following what is life-giving is always easy...sometimes it can feel darned uncomfortable. (Think "spiritual director" rather than "ordained minister.") It can feel vulnerable.
But, in the end, choosing to go with the flow has always been the best choice. Especially when you can go along with a friend who'll stick her head through an old screen door, just to keep you company.
peace and all good,
Lisa
I can't see.
I have contracted a stubborn virus that has temporarily injured my eyes and significantly impaired my vision. I cannot wear the contact lenses that I have worn nearly every day of my life since ninth grade. My distance vision with glasses is ok but not great...kind of like opening your eyes under water...but I can't see a thing up close with my glasses on, so to read or use the computer I must remove the , which means everything else is a blur. Needless to say, the idea of vision has been the focus of my contemplative life lately.
Many of the old things I sell are at their "vintage chic-est" when re-purposed for something other than their intended use....a cast iron gutter hopper as a wall sconce....a rusty wire basket as a moss lined planter....an enamel farm bucket as a wine bucket for a party...galvanized wash tub as raised garden bed...old iron grate as art...all re-purposed or RE-Visioned. It's fun to re-vision vintage items. LOTS of fun!
Spending quite a few hours in the dark, reflecting, I am even more mindful that just like the old things that I always seem to find their way to me, I can re-vision the everyday happenings of my life, recognizing them as the important spiritual learnings I believe they are. I can look for the Sacred in the ordinary, moments of my life...even the uncomfortable ones. Or maybe that should be, especially the uncomfortable ones. I've tried to stay open to Spirit. I've asked myself what this dis-ease has to teach me? Is there something I don't want to see? Is there something I need to see? I don't have any answers yet but I will keep sitting with it.
Meanwhile, since I haven't gone out into the light of day much at all, I've been busy re-visioning the things that have been languishing in my basement since I closed my shop. It's nice and dark in the basement! :)
One of the items I listed on ebay this week is a vintage french fishing creel. I wanted to include some inspiring photos in my listing so I tried to come up with creative ways to use the creel. First, I photographed it in the garden....
Then I tried it in the breakfast nook with some faux lavender...
And then I tried it in my ever so tiny downstairs half bath. I filled it with vintage looking dishtowels. My towels are not vintage but are precious, as they were embroidered by Michael's mom and grandmother. I think I liked the basket best here.
And speaking of re-visioning...when you are a cottage dweller, as we are, you need to make the most of every inch of space. Michael and I both enjoy photography but wall space for displaying our efforts is limited, so we turned a wall in this tiny half bath into our version of an art gallery...
The squarish basket in the corner is an English fishing basket....much different style than the French one and I believe would not be referred to as a proper "creel." The French basket is designed to be slung around the body. The square English basket also has a carrying strap but it is designed to be a little stool for sitting, while you fish. Charming. I tucked this smallish one in the corner to hold spare tp rolls.
So that's what I've been doing lately....sitting in the dark...my temporary loss of sight led me to a space just perfect for re-visioning. The movement of Spirit never ceases to amaze me.
peace and all good,
Lisa
My ChristCare group, Cultivating Mindfulness, has been experimenting with labyrinth prayer.
In
colloquial English, labyrinth is generally synonymous with maze, but
many contemporary scholars observe a distinction between the two: maze
refers to a complex branching (multicursal) puzzle with choices of path
and direction; while a single-path (unicursal) labyrinth has only a
single, non-branching path, which leads to the center. A labyrinth in
this sense has an unambiguous route to the center and back and is not
designed to be difficult to navigate. (Wikipedia).
Writer Dan Johnston points out that “a labyrinth is a
right brain task. It involves intuition, creativity, imagery.”
There’s
that word again....creativity! In the past, I considered the words
labyrinth and maze to be synonymous. It’s so interesting to me...being
mindful of the differences.
Johnston continues:
A
labyrinth is a right brain task. It involves intuition, creativity, and
imagery. With a maze many choices must be made and an active mind is
needed to solve the problem of finding the center. With a labyrinth
there is only one choice to be made. The choice is to enter or not. A
more passive, receptive mindset is needed. The choice is whether or not
to walk a spiritual path.
The
only physical maze I have experienced is a corn maze. Every year, at
least one is available to try at a farm fall festival around here. Designed for young children, it’s just my speed. To be honest,
with my sense of direction, just driving around my own town can often feel like a
maze to me.
Puzzles
frustrate me. Michael and I are very different in that way. He loves a
Rubik’s cube and can spend hours with it, if need be. Usually he's figured it out quite quickly. Me? Within five
minutes I want to throw it out the window. I've never solved a Rubik's cube.
Mazes (and puzzles) are not my cup of tea. But I have wanted to have a labyrinth
experience for quite some time now. And tonight, I walk the labyrinth
for the first time in the company of these amazingly smart and
unflinchingly brave women.
Last
week we prepared by meditating with a finger labyrinth. Click here to
download your own finger labyrinth and give it a try!
Please share any labyrinth experiences you have had in the comments section. I’d love to hear what you think about labyrinth meditation.
Here’s one last quote from Johnston:
With a maze many choices must be made and an active mind is needed to solve the problem of finding the center.
With a labyrinth there is only one choice to be made. The choice is to enter or not. A more passive, receptive mindset is needed. The choice is whether or not to walk a spiritual path.
I have no idea what will happen tonight but I am excited to find out!
Namaste,
Lisa
